Here I am back again for round two. As I lay here in bed I am more than well aware that I should not be here. I really should be prepping my meals for the day and hitting the gym before work. There is just a lot on my mind that I need to get out. Over the past few months I have worked my ass off day in and day out. The results that I am getting are phenomenal! At times its hard for me to see them but I hear people rant and rave all day. The "compliments" are great just depending on who you receive them from. There is always the good that comes with the bad. I know that to become who I want to be I need to change who I used to be. The hardest part of changing who I used to be is dealing with the people who I used to deal with. I continually allowed people to walk all over me and I'm dealing with the consequences now. Every time I turn around I feel that I am being attacked by someone. Sometimes these "attacks" are in person yet a lot of times they happen through the phone. It has been hard to deal with this on a daily basis but I am trying to stand my ground. A question that I have is what is an appropriate way to stand up for yourself?!?!?! I feel that anything that I might want to say in return would be inappropriate. I'm sick of negative people and I'm absolutely sick of people who just feel that they can say whatever the hell they want without ever thinking for one second how the words that come of their puny brain could affect someone else. Where the hell is the love....?
I have been trying to stay as positive as possible throughout this whole situation and I just have to acknowledge that I really do have some of the greatest friends I could ever imagine. Nothing but supportive, motivating, encouraging, loving and loyal friends. They help me stay strong through out this nonsense. I am a little upset that I have let these other people affect me as much as I have but this is all a learning process. I feel that with each situation I have tried to stand up for myself a little bit more then I would have before. Now I have lost clients over this but I feel that sometimes that is for the better. I will not allow myself to get thrown off because I have been having a serious off week. I never made it to the gym on Monday and my gym routine yesterday was interrupted by my career which I seriously was not happy about. I missed out on my boxing class and I was being verbally attacked about my body, my diet and my choices that I make during that time. It still makes me so upset thinking about what happened last night. Today I just haven't had it in me to get my butt out of bed(It is also rainy cold and the wind is blowing around out there which is no excuse but it adds to my mood right now). This week will just have to be an off week for me. I have been sticking to my "diet" though which makes me feel better and I will get into that in a little. For anyone who might read this who is going through what I'm going through I just need to say stay positive, stand your ground and KEEP IT MOVING!!! The advice I give I'm still learning to use myself but everyday is a new day and if i can be better today than I was yesterday than I am happy!
Now that I have gotten all that out I do feel a little better. I think I might actually bring my gym clothes with me to work and hit the gym when I get done. The gym is my thing it's what makes me feel better. I am able to release my frustrations through my workouts. I will finish up with a little about my new "diet" then I need to get my butt out of bed and prep myself for my day!!!! So the new "diet" I have been doing is a little like the paleo diet that is the newest craze. Mine is just a little more modified. I do not have the money to buy all organic fruits, vegetables or meat. Here is what a typical day consists of:
Breakfast:
1/4 cup almonds
1 whey protein isolate shake with water
1 piece of fruit
Snack ( I combine both in a back and pack 2 of these for the day and usually just pick when I'm hungry ) :
1/4 cup almonds
1/3 cup wasabi peas
fruitLunch :
Spinach salad
half baked boneless skinless chicken breast
green peppers, cucumbers, carrots and onions or whatever else I can find in my fridge
2 tbsp fat free balsamic dressing
Snack
Another snack baggie or another protein shake
piece of fruit
Dinner:
Another salad
another piece of fruit
A protein shake after working out
(Sidenote: I do still drink coffee I just stopped using creamer and cut back on the splenda I use. Besides the cup or two of coffee I drink throughout the day I drink ALL WATER!! There is no need to be drinking anything else and if you need to spark it up flavor it with a lemon or cucumber or an orange.)
Now there isn't much that is involved but it really is not as bad as everyone has been making it out to be. I can switch salmon tilapia tuna or any type of fish for the chicken in my salads. I just pack a bunch of different types of fruit and choose throughout the day. The almond and wasabi pea snack is to die for. YUM! I have been receiving a lot of questions about this since it is new and my friends are curious as to what I'm doing. If you ask me can I do this or can I do that my answer to you will be I can do whatever I want. My trainer isn't tying me down with a gun to my head forcing me to eat like this. I do this because I want to do this and I am just a little more locked in than I was before. Even if I can't stick with this for the whole month I know that I will just go back to eating healthy like I was doing before I started this which is also eating healthy. There is nothing wrong with trying new things and throwing your body for a loop. I could easily cook up a piece of salmon have some asparagus and have a mini spinach salad on the side or add tuna to one of my salads. Changing one or two ingredients of a recipe changes the whole taste and I enjoy that. I'm sure that when the month is up I will see some results but that is not what this is all about. I would more proud of myself for eating like this the whole month rather than loosing a certain amount of weight.
You may wonder why I keep putting diet in quotations. I say my new diet because it's easier but I'm really just changing my eating habits around. I hate to use the word diet but yet again it is just easier. This whole process is not about new fad diets or diets to make you drop 100 lbs in 2 months it is about changing everything that you used to do to everything that you want to do. It is not easy but just think about it ... If you don't change what you aren't happy about how do you expect to see any results that are different than what you are seeing now? Luckily this off weeks comes during a month that I took a pledge not to weigh myself. Even though I have been doing this for over two months I still have to constantly step my game up and change my ways. It is not an easy process but it is worth it! Find ways to keep yourself motivated. It could be through taking pictures of yourself or reading different articles in magazines or online or even just reading different motivational quotes. Find a buddy someone who might be interested in the same things as you. Someone you can rant on your bad days and boast on your great days! You just have to make sure that you hold yourself accountable because everything that you're doing you shouldn't be doing it for anyone besides yourself! :)
Time to get a move on my day! Hope everyone has a great one themselves!
Stay positive. xoxox
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